Hot Idea for a Chilly Problem

The kids and I are enjoying this beautiful, summery weather on a mid-April spring day.

I just love being outside - don't you?  I love the beach, hiking, walking, going to parks - anywhere really.  I never really had to make an effort to be outside.  I just naturally gravitated toward being outside.
Probably because when I was a kid, my parents encouraged me to be outside - ride bikes, roller skate, walk, run, swim - just play outside.

And this is something I am encouraging my kids to do and it's working.  Since they were born - they both enjoy being out and about outside. Not because it's forced - because they sincerely enjoy it.  It helps that we have a great back yard and the time to be outside, of course, but it makes me so happy to see them being active and just being kids.

This is why I was so disturbed and saddened when I came across this article last week on Cafe Mom. The article itself is great - 22 ideas for what to do with your kids outside.

The part I found disturbing was a statistic they shared:

"According to the study, highlighted in The New York Times, only 51 percent of parents said they take a child "for a walk or to play in yard, a park, or a playground" once a day. The stats were worse for girls rather than boys (parents of boys were 16 percent more likely to take them outside for play)." 

51%?  Yikes.

I thought again about that article today - ironically it was around 6:30 a.m. when my kiddos were already begging to go outside. Which again, I love - just after I have some coffee. :)

After eating some breakfast, we were outside by 9:00 a.m.  I hopped on a conference call while they played and by just after 10 - the kiddie pool was filled up and ready for play.

There was a slight problem - while it was already nearing 70 degrees out - the water from the hose was really cold.

What's a mom to do?

Well, I "figured" out something last year when I ran into the same issue of early morning fun combined with the fabulous warm weather & too-cold water.

I'm pretty certain I'm not the first person to think of it (nor do I claim to be) but it's a pretty good idea which I'm going to share with you.  Would you expect any less?

Hurray!  

So what's the big idea?

Add HOT water so it's not so cold.

So, I went back inside and filled up two huge pots of water and put them on the stove to boil.  You could also simply run the water to get it super hot to get the same effect - but it wastes water and also our water heater is set lower so it never gets that hot (safety first!).

After ten whiny minutes later - ta-da!

A "heated" kiddie pool.  Oooh, now that's a genius idea :)
Until then - this will do.

Happy kiddos = Happy Mama

I hope you're having a beautiful day and getting outside for the  kiddos - and remember - for YOU, too :)

Little moments

I miss the days of my now 3 year old and 22 month old when they were newborns. So soft, snuggly and, well - new.

Every now and again I catch a glimpse of those babies that will always be there - despite the whining, crying and fun associated with toddlers.

Today I caught one of those moments - these little moments that I get every day in different ways - that remind me not to take things for granted. Not to yell so much or expect too much from them. To let them just be kids - and to just be.

It's these little moments I treasure. And today, I caught a glimpse of my babies again while they peacefully napped. With our fur-baby not too far away - protecting, as usual.

Dealing With Separation Anxiety

Hello!  

I'd like to share with you some great advice from Elizabeth Pantley on the subject of Separation Anxiety.

This new awareness your child is experiencing is often a concern amongst parents and can create it's own set of stress, guilt and anxiety for parents themselves.

My own two children - ages 3 and 21 months - have both gone through varying stages of this  and am currently going through this stage with my 21 month old son.  I literally cannot seem to hold him enough.  If I sit on the floor, he has to be in my lap.  Despite being very into playing with toys, reading a book or happily playing with his sister - if I so much as walk into the other room (even though he can see me) he runs into the room crying "Ma-Ma!" as if I was walking out the door to the house!  

As anything with babies and toddlers - and eventually into the teenage years - it's all a phase and we hope it shall pass.  But while you're in the midst of it all, it can be hard to feel that it will never end.  Especially with tears, whining and constant nagging or crying.

So, if you find that you're coming into this phase, you're past it, or right here with me in the middle of it all - please read the excerpt below.

I'd love to hear some feedback or ways you plan to or have coped in the past.

Separation Anxiety

By Elizabeth Pantley, Author of Gentle Baby Care

My baby is only happy when I’m within arm’s reach. If I dare to leave the room, she cries as if I’ve left the country! I can’t even so much as take a shower these days, let alone leave the house without her. My mother-in-law says it’s because I’ve spoiled her. Is she right? Have I made her so clingy?

Nothing you’ve done has “made” your baby develop separation anxiety. It’s a perfectly normal and important developmental adaptation. Nearly all children experience separation anxiety between the ages of seven and 18 months. Some have more intense reactions than others, and for some, the stage lasts longer than others, but almost all babies have it to some degree.

The development of separation anxiety demonstrates that your baby has formed a healthy, loving attachment to you. It is a beautiful sign that your baby associates pleasure, comfort, and security with your presence. It also indicates that your baby is developing intellectually (in other words, she’s smart!) She has learned that she can have an effect on her world when she makes her needs known, and she doesn’t have to passively accept a situation that makes her uncomfortable. She doesn’t know enough about the world yet to understand that when you leave her you’ll always come back. She also realizes that she is safest, happiest, and best cared for by you, so her reluctance to part makes perfect sense ¾ especially when viewed from a survival standpoint. Put another way: You are her source of nourishment, both physical and emotional; therefore, her attachment to you is her means of survival, and when she reaches a certain level of intellectual maturity, she realizes this.

This stage, like so many others in childhood, will pass. In time, your baby will learn that she can separate from you, that you will return, and that everything will be okay between those two points in time. Much of this learning is based on trust, which, just as for every human being young or old, takes time to build.

How do I know if my baby has separation anxiety?

Separation anxiety is pretty easy to spot, and you’re probably reading this section because you’ve identified it in your baby. The following are behaviors typically demonstrated by a baby with normal separation anxiety:

• Clinginess
• Crying when a parent is out of sight
• Strong preference for only one parent
• Fear of strangers
• Waking at night crying for a parent
• Easily comforted in a parent’s embrace

 How you can help your baby with separation anxiety

• Allow your baby to be a baby. It’s perfectly okay — even wonderful — for your baby to be so attached to you and for her to desire your constant companionship. Congratulations, Mommy or Daddy: It’s evidence that the bond you’ve worked so hard to create is holding. So politely ignore those who tell you otherwise.
  
  
• Don’t worry about spoiling her with your love, since quite the opposite will happen. The more that you meet her attachment needs during babyhood, the more confident and secure she will grow up to be.
  
  
• Minimize separations when possible. It’s perfectly acceptable for now ¾ better, in fact ¾ to avoid those situations that would have you separate from your baby. All too soon, your baby will move past this phase and on to the next developmental milestone.

• Give your baby lessons in object permanence. As your baby learns that things continue to exist even when she can’t see them, she’ll feel better about letting you out of her sight. Games like peek-a-boo and hide-and-seek will help her understand this phenomenon.
  
  
• Practice with quick, safe separations. Throughout the day, create situations of brief separation. When you go into another room, whistle, sing, or talk to your baby so she knows you’re still there, even though she can’t see you.
  
  
• Don’t sneak away when you have to leave her. It may seem easier than dealing with a tearful goodbye, but it will just cause her constant worry that you’re going to disappear without warning at any given moment. The result? Even more clinginess, and diminished trust in your relationship.
  
  
• Tell your baby what to expect. If you are going to the store and leaving her at home with Grandma, explain where you are going and tell her when you’ll be back. Eventually, she’ll come to understand your explanations.
  
  
• Don’t rush the parting, but don’t prolong it, either. Give your baby ample time to process your leave-taking, but don’t drag it out and make it more painful for both of you.
  
  
• Express a positive attitude when leaving her. If you’re off to work, or an evening out, leave with a smile. Your baby will absorb your emotions, so if you’re nervous about leaving her, she’ll be nervous as well. Your confidence will help alleviate her fears.
  
  
• Leave your baby with familiar people. If you must leave your baby with a new caregiver, try to arrange a few visits when you’ll all be together before you leave the two of them alone for the first time.
  
  
• Invite distractions. If you’re leaving your baby with a caregiver or relative, encourage that person to get your baby involved with playtime as you leave. Say a quick good-bye and let your baby be distracted by an interesting activity. 
  
  
• Allow your baby the separation that she initiates. If she crawls off to another room, don’t rush after her. Listen and peek, of course, to make sure that she’s safe, but let her know it’s fine for her to go off exploring on her own.
  
  
• Encourage her relationship with a special toy, if she seems to have one. These are called transitional objects or lovies. They can be a comfort to her when she’s separated from you. Many babies adopt blankets or soft toys as loveys, holding them to ease any pain of separation. The lovey becomes a friend and represents security in the face of change.
  
  
• Don’t take it personally. Many babies go through a stage of attaching themselves to one parent or the other. The other parent, as well as grandparents, siblings and friends can find this difficult to accept, but try to reassure them that it’s just a temporary and normal phase of development and with a little time and gentle patience it will pass.
  
  

This article is an excerpt from Gentle Baby Care by Elizabeth Pantley. (McGraw-Hill, 2003)  

Discipline and your child

Hello!

I hope this post finds you well! 

Even though my official title is Baby Planner - that doesn't mean I do not assist parents with older children as well - especially toddlers.

Since I have a toddler and now a preschooler in our home, I'm in the middle of toddlerhood, including discipline, tantrums and the craziness of it all. 

You name a discipline tactic and it's guaranteed I've tried it!  (Well, most ones anyways!)

I came across this article on a blog and wanted to share it with you all.

So whether you're right there with me in toddlerhood or you're cuddling your sweet newborn - do yourself a favor and just have a quick look. 

Don't worry - I'll still be here if or when you need some help :)

Janet Lansbury's No Bad Kids

Parenting Tip - Extras, extras!

One of my favorite things about being a Baby Planner & Consultant is that I get to share all of my experiences, knowledge, tricks and tips with parents. 

So, today I'd like to share one of my all-time favorite tips with you.  It is something that took me quite a few months of lugging around a way-overpacked-can't-zip-it-full diaper bag. 

And that was when I only had one baby! 

So, this favorite tip of mine is:

To have a bag of "extras" packed in your car. 

You'll have your regular diaper bag for regular day-to-day outings and you'll keep your usual stash of stuff in there.  So, why would you need this bag of extras? 

Hypothetically (of course) let's say you (or your husband, partner, or whoever) took that last diaper out of the bag and did not replace it.   

ACK! 
It's one of the biggest fears I think new parents have - not having what they need when they need it.  Well, it was one of my biggest fears.  I mean, sure, you can stop at any local store to pick up diapers, wipes, a pacifier or whatever you are out of. 

But face it - it's painful to pay top dollar for convenience when you have more at home! 

However, if it's in your car in that *magic* stash of the "extras" bag you have at all times - no more panics or wardrobe catastrophes - or pooptastrophes as I like to call them.  (Yes, those blowouts that no stain remover can save!)

So, here is what is in my "extras" bag in my car right now:

1. Four or five extras of the current size diaper/pull ups/ underwear my children are wearing.  KEY HERE IS CURRENT SIZE!  Every time you go up in the size of diaper, change out your "extras" stash! 
2. An extra bag or package of wipes.
3. Two spare changes of clothes for each child - again change as your child grows AND by the season!  Don't forget socks, too!
4. Extra snacks (packaged i.e. granola bars), juice box and bottled water.
5. Tissues and napkins.
6. Sunblock.
7. First aid items - band aids, antibiotic cream, alcohol wipes for boo-boos on the go.
8. Hand sanitizer for me and the kids - a kid-friendly kind and Purell for me - alcohol in kid sanitizer is a no-no!
9. Crayons, coloring books and a few random toys.
10. An extra hat and sweat shirt for each child.  Now that it's Spring here, it can be unexpectedly chilly or we could make an quick stop at the park - and either way, I'm prepared if I don't catch the weather forecast.
11. An extra outfit for myself. 
12. "Bribe" items - a few lollipops and two containers of mini M&Ms.  These are kept on-hand for my toddlers when I'm out and need to get something accomplished and they're just not in the mood to cooperate. 

Now that my kids are older, my "extras" bag is smaller.  That wasn't always the case.

Here are the items I used to keep in the bag when my kids were babies:

1. Extra pacifiers.
2. Pacifier wipes for cleaning if they fell or were dropped and was not near hot water.
3. More of a selection of toys - rattles, musical toys, soft books, etc.
4. More snacks and extra baby food based on current stage they were on - i.e. puffs, yogurt melts, a few extra spoons and containers of pureed baby food.
5. Extra diaper cream.
6. Extra burp cloths.
7. Extra bibs.
8. A light swaddle blanket - can be used for a burp cloth, extra changing pad if you forgot yours, a nursing cover, etc.
9. A heavier blanket.
10. More "extra" clothes/outfits - again changed seasonally and as their clothing sizes changed.

So, there you have it.  Genius?  I'd like to think so - but no, it's just common sense.  I see parents all the time with these gigantic, overflowing diaper bags they are struggling to stuff underneath the stroller in that tiny basket. Or worse, trying to carry a child (or two) with this monstrosity of a bag. 

So, do you have any other tips to make going out-and-about with baby easier?  Would love to hear them! 

Tackling Toy Clutter

If you have a toddler (or in my case two toddlers) you have often wondered or said the following:

"Why does it look like Toys R Us threw up in my living room?"

"How can such a small person make such a huge mess?"

"Ugh!  I just cleaned in here! Why do I bother?"

You get the picture. 

A personal favorite quote of mine is: "Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing up is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing." ~Phyllis Diller

Unfortunately, cleaning is a necessary evil.  I know I personally can't go to sleep at night knowing that there are dirty dishes in the sink (soaking pans are okay in my book).  

I literally will not be able to fall asleep if the play room is a mess and there are toys strewn about everywhere.  So, pretty much every night, without fail, I tidy up before I go to bed.  

Wait!  Before you think I'm a complete neat-freak and obsessive, I promise you, I'm not. 

I just can't stand walking downstairs first thing in the morning (un-caffeinated) to a huge mess!  And lord help someone if I happen to *step* on a random toy -ouch! 
That's the worst - you know!

After doing this for a few years now, I do not consider myself an organizational queen by any means, but I have picked up a few tips and tricks along the way. 

I feel it is my duty as a fellow Mommy, baby planner and human being to share my toy organization with you.  It has made cleaning up easier - and most importantly, my kids can HELP with the clean up process. 

Here is how I organize our toys:

1. Categorize your toys that you need containers for ex. balls, blocks, cars, etc.
2. Go to the local dollar store and pick out some colorful buckets and baskets.
3. Find some construction paper or index cards.  (I used old holiday cards I wasn't going to use and cut them in half)
4. Pick out a few crayons, markers and sharpies.
5. Grab a hole punch and some sort of string or some scotch tape.
6. Dig deep into that elementary school part of you and draw some pictures!

The the end result of the six steps above should look something along the lines of this:

Please ignore the horrible drawings! 
Art clearly was not my strong suit.

Ball basket

This three drawer was bought at a Target, but I actually had
this before we had our kids.



Cars and Little People 



Kitchen Accessories & Food
(Um, yes, those mini M&M's were
purchased as bribery for something!)



Full view of one set of shelves



Phones, Keys & Remotes
(As we all know, they always want the REAL one anyways)

Musical Instruments
(This is the Parents brand Bee Band - super cute!)
*Sorry, I could not get this picture to be centered
for some formatting reason! Grrr!

So, as you can see, everything has a place for the most part.  This not only allows the kids to help put things away as they are labeled with words AND pictures - it also helps when you have friends over, a play date or a party and people don't have to bother you every five seconds to find out what goes where! 

Genius.

Of course, I can't take credit for inventing this system - it's not original.  However, it works for us.  And that's really the key to parenting, isn't it?  Finding what works for YOU.

Don't forget to also periodically go through all those toys and pass them along to friends, organize toy swaps, sell at tag sales or place on Freecycle.  I frequently do all the above and also pass along toys to local charities.

This "system" for lack of a better word was not expensive to create, either.  You can even use containers, Rubbermaid storage bins (I used one for the kitchen toys) or whatever you have laying around.  But I do love the dollar store!

Do you have any toy organizing tips?  If you do, I'd love to hear them.