Can't We All Just..?

image via Time web site

...get along?

...agree to disagree?

...not go backwards in thinking?

...not hinder progress?

...avoid "mommy wars" if and when possible?

...truly try not to judge others?

...not over-expose our kids if possible?

...protect our right to free speech and free parenting?

...not make up debate-creating magazine covers?

...see that just feeding and loving your baby is first and foremost?

...not ask people if they are "mom enough"?

The list could truly go on as you know, but I won't.  There are plenty of other web sites, blogs and chat boards where debates can and will ensue.  I'd like to say the copy behind the image is what truly bothers me the most about this whole thing.

The AAP recommends breastfeeding for at least 6 months - then the rest is up to the mother and family.

What are your thoughts?

Hot Idea for a Chilly Problem

The kids and I are enjoying this beautiful, summery weather on a mid-April spring day.

I just love being outside - don't you?  I love the beach, hiking, walking, going to parks - anywhere really.  I never really had to make an effort to be outside.  I just naturally gravitated toward being outside.
Probably because when I was a kid, my parents encouraged me to be outside - ride bikes, roller skate, walk, run, swim - just play outside.

And this is something I am encouraging my kids to do and it's working.  Since they were born - they both enjoy being out and about outside. Not because it's forced - because they sincerely enjoy it.  It helps that we have a great back yard and the time to be outside, of course, but it makes me so happy to see them being active and just being kids.

This is why I was so disturbed and saddened when I came across this article last week on Cafe Mom. The article itself is great - 22 ideas for what to do with your kids outside.

The part I found disturbing was a statistic they shared:

"According to the study, highlighted in The New York Times, only 51 percent of parents said they take a child "for a walk or to play in yard, a park, or a playground" once a day. The stats were worse for girls rather than boys (parents of boys were 16 percent more likely to take them outside for play)." 

51%?  Yikes.

I thought again about that article today - ironically it was around 6:30 a.m. when my kiddos were already begging to go outside. Which again, I love - just after I have some coffee. :)

After eating some breakfast, we were outside by 9:00 a.m.  I hopped on a conference call while they played and by just after 10 - the kiddie pool was filled up and ready for play.

There was a slight problem - while it was already nearing 70 degrees out - the water from the hose was really cold.

What's a mom to do?

Well, I "figured" out something last year when I ran into the same issue of early morning fun combined with the fabulous warm weather & too-cold water.

I'm pretty certain I'm not the first person to think of it (nor do I claim to be) but it's a pretty good idea which I'm going to share with you.  Would you expect any less?

Hurray!  

So what's the big idea?

Add HOT water so it's not so cold.

So, I went back inside and filled up two huge pots of water and put them on the stove to boil.  You could also simply run the water to get it super hot to get the same effect - but it wastes water and also our water heater is set lower so it never gets that hot (safety first!).

After ten whiny minutes later - ta-da!

A "heated" kiddie pool.  Oooh, now that's a genius idea :)
Until then - this will do.

Happy kiddos = Happy Mama

I hope you're having a beautiful day and getting outside for the  kiddos - and remember - for YOU, too :)

Babies, toddlers and TV - finally, a solution!

Ahh, yes.  It's one of those hot topics in the parenting world.

The age-old question:

"How much TV is okay to let my baby/toddler/child/teenager watch?"

And the answer you hear from every parent will vary.  Some say "none".  Some will say "too much".

But the TV/No TV debate is not the point of this post.

Whether you choose to let your babies/toddlers/kids watch TV is YOUR choice and WHAT you let them watch is also up to you.  I'm Pro-Mom, remember :)

Anywhoooo - as a side note I will share with you that both of my children have been watching TV - meaning DVDs and age-appropriate shows on toddler-friendly channels - since they were young.  My now 2 year old son was exposed to it earlier than my 3.5 year old daughter was at the same age, but that's just a result of being in the same room with the older sibling and being a work at home parent.

On to the point - the solution!

One day, when we were a one kid household, my daughter was asking for "Da-Da"- she was around 13 months old.  As he works out of the home, there was really no way for this to happen (obviously before FaceTime on iPhones).  And, since I work from home, something came up where I really needed to do something work-related that was time sensitive and needed my daughter to be entertained so I could just get something accomplished.

As I searched through the selection and debated which DVD to put on for her that would really captivate her attention for longer than the usual 5 possibly 10 minutes. Then, just as I cringed at idea of her watching more TV that day than had already been "allowed"- I came across a "genius" idea.

Genius I tell you!

It was our wedding DVD.  It was perfect for a few reasons:

• It was something she had never seen before 

• It had music, motion and people in it

• She could watch our wedding DVD and therefore see her Da-Da

• It exposed her to a new language (Hebrew) from the Rabbi who married us

With fingers crossed, I popped in the DVD and hopped on my conference call and she was mesmerized!

Aside from screaming Da-da at the TV every few minutes, I was able to get done what I had needed to do while she was entertained by the TV but with something that was family-related and a part of our family history.

Of course, now I'm even more glad we paid a bazillion dollars for the wedding videographer :)

Now, when I need to get something accomplished my kiddos are now older so it is easier to avoid using the TV as a distraction - but there are days when I need to do something urgent or cannot be interrupted every five seconds.

This is now one of my four go-to DVDs.  Since our wedding DVD worked so well, it prompted my husband to create three additional DVDs of our kids and they are a compilation of everything from us in the hospital with each of them to themselves as babies playing with toys, taking their first steps, eating their first foods and enjoying cake on their first birthdays and beyond.

So, yes, it's watching TV.  But they are watching and experiencing our family moments.

Also, watching their faces light up while watching themselves is just adorable, too.

Love Me Some Blogs Pt. 2

I shared a few of my favorites with you just the other day, but I'd like to share a few more:

Tip Junkie - http://www.tipjunkie.com/
This site makes me soooooo jealous of all the crafty people of the world. I see so many great DIY projects, organizing and decorating ideas - and their holiday ideas are great, too!

The Connected Mom - http://www.theconnectedmom.com

I enjoy her posts immensely. Not too many moms feel they can say certain things about motherhood.

On the same note, a more honest and "scary" side, is Scary Mommy - http://www.scarymommy.com/

Here, she lays it all out there - from her unique perspective. She has a book due out this April and her site is also the home of the confessional where you can anonymously post whatever you want. I mean What.Ev.Er.

One last one is Meagan Francis The Happiest Mom - http://thehappiestmom.com

She is an author and mom and offers another glimpse into mommy-hood honestly and offers realistic ways to keep it all together. She also shares how to keep the focus on yourself, too.

I'm Pro-Moms. What are you?

We have all heard of them - and likely been involved in a conversation about one.

I'm talking about those "mommy wars" that just don't seem to go away.  Oh, you know the ones I'm speaking of: formula feeding vs. bottle, crying methods of sleep training vs. non-crying methods, working moms vs. stay at home moms, etc. etc.

They can rear their ugly head from just about anyone these days - even strangers can come up to you and express their (unwanted) opinions to you.

Unfortunately I come across these more often than I'd like as an occupational hazard and within my own circle of friends ;)

However, as opinionated as I am in my personal life and choices I've made along with my husband for our children - I am NOT when it comes to supporting my clients, friends or families I help along the way.

I'm not pro anything.  I believe parenting is a series of choices - most of which we tend to make on the fly or as we go.  There is no right or wrong way, per se, but I do believe in planning and researching from qualified sources as much as possible.  I do believe in getting opinions and having conversations with other moms and professionals and getting different perspectives.

I actually take back what I just said about not being pro anything.  I'm pro-MOMS.  I just support moms in general - regardless of their choices. Period.

What about you?  Has someone recently engaged you in one of those aforementioned "mommy wars"?  If so, what was it?  I would love to hear about it!

Little moments

I miss the days of my now 3 year old and 22 month old when they were newborns. So soft, snuggly and, well - new.

Every now and again I catch a glimpse of those babies that will always be there - despite the whining, crying and fun associated with toddlers.

Today I caught one of those moments - these little moments that I get every day in different ways - that remind me not to take things for granted. Not to yell so much or expect too much from them. To let them just be kids - and to just be.

It's these little moments I treasure. And today, I caught a glimpse of my babies again while they peacefully napped. With our fur-baby not too far away - protecting, as usual.

Holding onto "Me" as a Mom

There are some days when I think back to the life of leisurely dinners out with my husband and good friends, last-minute weekend trips or lounging a little longer in bed on a Sunday morning.  

Luckily, those days aren’t gone, but they have taken a back-seat to our life now with our kids. 

When you become a parent, you know it is the most amazing, life changing experience – both figuratively and literally.  You feel as if you could never love someone more.  Ever.  

Yet, somehow, while that love grew and grew for my children, somehow it diminished the “love” I seemed to show myself. 

Even though it was a choice we made, I started to feel guilty for wanting to be kid-free for a few hours and feeling I needed to be away from my children. I started to feel like something was wrong with me for feeling like that.  These are the types of things I like to call the “dark-side” of parenting. 

However, I’m here to tell you it is in fact completely normal to feel that way and it does not make you a bad parent.  In fact – it may make you a better one.  

I came across two great posts on the subject with some excellent tips:

A Post at Mommyologist

Connected Parenting

A slight part of the problem is I love being with my kids! Even though I still find it hard to take time away from my kids, it’s become something I’m very aware of now because it is healthy and important for everyone.  

So now that I’m aware of it, what am I doing about it?  I’ve decided it’s time to focus on myself again.* I’m reconnecting with my friends and making sure my husband and I continue to take time for each other. 

Additionally, my daughter is starting preschool in just a week or so now and that will be great for her, too.  In time, it will be easier as our kids get older. 

Even though I let a little piece of myself go in becoming a mother, I’ve found it’s easy to get it back and I’ve gained so much more in the “sacrifice”.

If you’re looking for a great laugh and an honest take on motherhood, check out Scary Mommy.



Me & my kiddos



Note: This was a recent column of mine from my Mom's Talk column featured on Patch

*Editor's note: Carly started a new job with Plum District and continues her baby planning business

Dealing With Separation Anxiety

Hello!  

I'd like to share with you some great advice from Elizabeth Pantley on the subject of Separation Anxiety.

This new awareness your child is experiencing is often a concern amongst parents and can create it's own set of stress, guilt and anxiety for parents themselves.

My own two children - ages 3 and 21 months - have both gone through varying stages of this  and am currently going through this stage with my 21 month old son.  I literally cannot seem to hold him enough.  If I sit on the floor, he has to be in my lap.  Despite being very into playing with toys, reading a book or happily playing with his sister - if I so much as walk into the other room (even though he can see me) he runs into the room crying "Ma-Ma!" as if I was walking out the door to the house!  

As anything with babies and toddlers - and eventually into the teenage years - it's all a phase and we hope it shall pass.  But while you're in the midst of it all, it can be hard to feel that it will never end.  Especially with tears, whining and constant nagging or crying.

So, if you find that you're coming into this phase, you're past it, or right here with me in the middle of it all - please read the excerpt below.

I'd love to hear some feedback or ways you plan to or have coped in the past.

Separation Anxiety

By Elizabeth Pantley, Author of Gentle Baby Care

My baby is only happy when I’m within arm’s reach. If I dare to leave the room, she cries as if I’ve left the country! I can’t even so much as take a shower these days, let alone leave the house without her. My mother-in-law says it’s because I’ve spoiled her. Is she right? Have I made her so clingy?

Nothing you’ve done has “made” your baby develop separation anxiety. It’s a perfectly normal and important developmental adaptation. Nearly all children experience separation anxiety between the ages of seven and 18 months. Some have more intense reactions than others, and for some, the stage lasts longer than others, but almost all babies have it to some degree.

The development of separation anxiety demonstrates that your baby has formed a healthy, loving attachment to you. It is a beautiful sign that your baby associates pleasure, comfort, and security with your presence. It also indicates that your baby is developing intellectually (in other words, she’s smart!) She has learned that she can have an effect on her world when she makes her needs known, and she doesn’t have to passively accept a situation that makes her uncomfortable. She doesn’t know enough about the world yet to understand that when you leave her you’ll always come back. She also realizes that she is safest, happiest, and best cared for by you, so her reluctance to part makes perfect sense ¾ especially when viewed from a survival standpoint. Put another way: You are her source of nourishment, both physical and emotional; therefore, her attachment to you is her means of survival, and when she reaches a certain level of intellectual maturity, she realizes this.

This stage, like so many others in childhood, will pass. In time, your baby will learn that she can separate from you, that you will return, and that everything will be okay between those two points in time. Much of this learning is based on trust, which, just as for every human being young or old, takes time to build.

How do I know if my baby has separation anxiety?

Separation anxiety is pretty easy to spot, and you’re probably reading this section because you’ve identified it in your baby. The following are behaviors typically demonstrated by a baby with normal separation anxiety:

• Clinginess
• Crying when a parent is out of sight
• Strong preference for only one parent
• Fear of strangers
• Waking at night crying for a parent
• Easily comforted in a parent’s embrace

 How you can help your baby with separation anxiety

• Allow your baby to be a baby. It’s perfectly okay — even wonderful — for your baby to be so attached to you and for her to desire your constant companionship. Congratulations, Mommy or Daddy: It’s evidence that the bond you’ve worked so hard to create is holding. So politely ignore those who tell you otherwise.
  
  
• Don’t worry about spoiling her with your love, since quite the opposite will happen. The more that you meet her attachment needs during babyhood, the more confident and secure she will grow up to be.
  
  
• Minimize separations when possible. It’s perfectly acceptable for now ¾ better, in fact ¾ to avoid those situations that would have you separate from your baby. All too soon, your baby will move past this phase and on to the next developmental milestone.

• Give your baby lessons in object permanence. As your baby learns that things continue to exist even when she can’t see them, she’ll feel better about letting you out of her sight. Games like peek-a-boo and hide-and-seek will help her understand this phenomenon.
  
  
• Practice with quick, safe separations. Throughout the day, create situations of brief separation. When you go into another room, whistle, sing, or talk to your baby so she knows you’re still there, even though she can’t see you.
  
  
• Don’t sneak away when you have to leave her. It may seem easier than dealing with a tearful goodbye, but it will just cause her constant worry that you’re going to disappear without warning at any given moment. The result? Even more clinginess, and diminished trust in your relationship.
  
  
• Tell your baby what to expect. If you are going to the store and leaving her at home with Grandma, explain where you are going and tell her when you’ll be back. Eventually, she’ll come to understand your explanations.
  
  
• Don’t rush the parting, but don’t prolong it, either. Give your baby ample time to process your leave-taking, but don’t drag it out and make it more painful for both of you.
  
  
• Express a positive attitude when leaving her. If you’re off to work, or an evening out, leave with a smile. Your baby will absorb your emotions, so if you’re nervous about leaving her, she’ll be nervous as well. Your confidence will help alleviate her fears.
  
  
• Leave your baby with familiar people. If you must leave your baby with a new caregiver, try to arrange a few visits when you’ll all be together before you leave the two of them alone for the first time.
  
  
• Invite distractions. If you’re leaving your baby with a caregiver or relative, encourage that person to get your baby involved with playtime as you leave. Say a quick good-bye and let your baby be distracted by an interesting activity. 
  
  
• Allow your baby the separation that she initiates. If she crawls off to another room, don’t rush after her. Listen and peek, of course, to make sure that she’s safe, but let her know it’s fine for her to go off exploring on her own.
  
  
• Encourage her relationship with a special toy, if she seems to have one. These are called transitional objects or lovies. They can be a comfort to her when she’s separated from you. Many babies adopt blankets or soft toys as loveys, holding them to ease any pain of separation. The lovey becomes a friend and represents security in the face of change.
  
  
• Don’t take it personally. Many babies go through a stage of attaching themselves to one parent or the other. The other parent, as well as grandparents, siblings and friends can find this difficult to accept, but try to reassure them that it’s just a temporary and normal phase of development and with a little time and gentle patience it will pass.
  
  

This article is an excerpt from Gentle Baby Care by Elizabeth Pantley. (McGraw-Hill, 2003)  

Just a click away!

Sorry it's been awhile since my last post.  This warm weather has us out and about more.  I'm not going to complain, though. 

Anywhoooo - a recent article for my gig over at Patch for my weekly Mom's Talk column featured some great online resources that helps make life a bit easier.  That's why the Internet exists, right? Errr, something like that ;p

Either way, here's the article!

Clickable Resources - Saving you money, time and yes, even your sanity!
By Carly Kirsch, Mom's Talk on Patch.com

In this digital age that we’re in, you would think that all the technology in our lives should theoretically make things easier, right?  Well, yes…and no. 

Yes, because it makes life easier on the go with mobile phones, smart phones, iPads, iPods, and of course lap top computers.

No, because at times, the Internet can be overwhelming with so many web sites.  Not knowing where to look or start can eat up precious time or can sometimes lead to misinformation. 

To save you the hassle of figuring out where to start, I’ve compiled a list of some of my favorite web sites that will save you time, effort, money – but most importantly, your sanity! 

Social Sites

1. Meet Up – This web site allows you to find groups to join based on specific interests, topics or hobbies.  For me, it was a lifesaver for finding a local playgroup when I had my first child.  It’s free to sign up but some of the groups may charge a small yearly fee for membership.   There’s truly a Meet Up for everyone!
2. Babble –  This is not just another parenting board.  Babble is loaded (I mean LOADED) with blogs and useful information for you that offers a real take on parenting, cooking, life and more.
3. Facebook – Yes, you may already have an account, but are you using it to your fullest potential?  If you “like” certain businesses and local places, you can find some good discounts or special promotions.  It’s a great way to stay in touch with family and friends.  Just make sure your privacy settings are up to date!  Go here for the article about Facebook safety.
4. Twitter– Twitter is a fast-paced version of Facebook with much more opportunity for networking.  You can follow any of the local news channels and even Cheshire Patch to stay up to the minute with news, weather and more.  It’s saved me a few hours of time I otherwise would have wasted in traffic since I checked my Twitter timeline once or twice! 

Money-Saving Sites

1. Baby Cheapskate – This web site, or daily email, provides you the inside scoop on lots of sales, coupon match ups and more for baby and kid gear.  There is always information on holiday sales and sneak peeks as to what will go on sale and when. 
2. Mama Cheaps– Looking for deals on diapers?  This site has all the inside information for diaper deals both online and in store, coupon codes and a lot more.  Their tagline is "Where frugality meets family."  I've got quite a few great deals from reading this site on a number of occasions.
3. Amazon Mom – This program gives you amazing deals on products for baby and kids with fast shipping because when you sign up you receive Amazon Prime shipping with subsequent purchases!  Millions of products are available on Amazon Mom with as-expected low prices and great customer service.
4. Groupon - It's just as it's name says: Group Coupons.  Deals in Connecticut are offered via Groupon and if it's a restaurant, business or product you want, simply buy it for the group discount rate.  It's a great way to keep your eye on your inbox for some great local deals for the family.  I have a feeling as summer approaches there will be some really great family fun opportunities!
5. Living Social– A little different than Groupon, Living Social states that they can save you anywhere from 50-90% on local business offerings - but deals are usually only offered for one day.  So, once they've offered it and it's gone, it's gone! 

Time-Saving & Helpful Sites

1. Evernote – This really neat web site (and application for your smart phone) allows you to sync your smart phone with your computer for notes, voice notes and pictures so you never forget a thing!
2. Pinterest– It’s an online pinboard for ideas, crafts, places, books, fashion and so much more.  NOTE: It is currently by invite only so if you need an invitation, email me at carlykirsch@gmail.com.  It’s highly addicting so at first, you may curse me, but then love me for introducing it to you.  It’s okay, I can live with myself either way!
3. Hulu – A web site to view your favorite shows that you just can’t seem to watch during the day, or stay up for at night – right from your computer! 
4. Allrecipes – I mentioned this site last week in my Picky Eaters column, but aside from that, this site can save you time by looking up recipes based on ingredients you have in the house and it can save you the hassle of figuring out if the recipe is tasty or not based on their reviews.  You can also create an online recipes book to keep all your favorite ones! 
5. Real Simple – I have a subscription to this magazine, but you can use their web site for free and have access to all the articles and more.  They have this section titled “New Uses for Old Things”to re-purpose common household items – and some are pretty genius.  They also have fast and easy recipes, useful cleaning tips and tricks and more.  Sign up for some of their newsletters to have it sent right to your inbox. 
6. Disney Family Fun –This web site is packed with crafts, ideas to do with the kids, printables and so much more.  I could spend hours on this web site looking for ideas – good thing I have Pinterest!

Miscellaneous Sites

1. One Step Ahead – Also Leaps & Bounds, has some really innovative and unique products for babies, toddlers and kids that work the way they say they will. 
2. Mashable– This site is great because it offers some really useful shortcuts for programs like Gmail and has some other useful tips for social media as well.  I consider myself to be technologically savvy (while others would beg to differ), but this site has taken my savviness to a whole new level.
3. iPhone Apps – I’ve got to tell you: I just got an iPhone.  And, I love it.  So if you also have an iPhone, there are some really great apps for parents.   Additionally, Time Magazine came out with their 50 Best iPhone apps here.
4. Sesame Street Online- This site has free games for your kids with their favorite characters.  They also have printables, online episodes, activities and more to keep your kids busy so you can have five minutes to check your email or something that needs to be taken care of.  (Or check out some of these other sites I’ve suggested!)   
5. Swagbucks– It’s a search engine that you sign up for free and accumulate points which can then be turned into gift cards or redeemed for thousands of other things.  So, instead of using Google, you’d create your homepage as Swagbucks and earn as you search.  There are also surveys and other things to participate in.

So, there you have it!  Do you have any time saving or fun web sites?  If so, I'd love for you share with us.

Are you aware?

May is Pregnancy Awareness Month!

Pregnancy Awareness has some great giveaways going on all month long to celebrate! 

So head on over there and check out their educational information and enter to win some great prizes from Seventh Generation and Plum Organics!  There are contests running all month long, too.

Go ahead and celebrate moms everywhere - new moms, expecting moms and all the future moms out there!  Pregnancy Awareness will feature this month-long campaign by focusing on their key initiatives of: 

1. Education
2. Exercise
3. Nutrition & Wellness
4. Nurture

Know someone who would enjoy this information?  Please feel free to share.

P.S. Mother's Day is May 8th!

Got Mommy Friends?

After settling back into my life shortly after having my first child, I strongly began to feel the need again to socialize.  Like most people B.C. (Before Children), I had an active social calendar - dinners with other couples, coffee with friends, shopping, last minute pedicures, long, leisurely lunches, etc.

Eager to resume these social activities, of course, I picked up the phone to call my friends. 

However, after numerous conversations with my now categorized as child-less** friends, both on the phone and in person - I found a huge issue had arose.  In a lot of ways, it now felt to me as if we had nothing in common on the surface. 

While they still spoke of long nights out, shopping sprees and other "fun" things - I was consumed with thoughts of poopy diapers, laundry and just figuring out this whole new "mom" thing I had going on. 

Don't get me wrong or misunderstand - my friends are still wonderful, fabulous people and I am still friends with them today - however; I now had a baby and they did not.  And anyone who has kids knows what I'm sayin'.  It's not a bad thing, per se...it's just different. 

Oh, just let me explain.

Since I didn't have many friends who had children, I asked myself:  "Where can I find me some mommy friends?"

To the Internet I went and discovered a web site called Meetup.com.  I joined a lovely group of moms - some of whom I immediately connected with.  We went to parks, the local zoo, had play dates and I got a chance to socialize myself and my daughter while I still worked from home part-time.

However, I found that even in that large group, it was still hard to connect with another mom "just because" you both have kids.  I mean, you don't just randomly approach strangers in the store or in public and say - "Hey, I see you have a kid.  Well, I have a kid, too, so let's be friends!" 

Yeah...it doesn't work like that.  That would be weird. 

For a few months, I continued to be an active member of the group.  Then, after a short 8 months of having figured out be a mom to one baby, I became pregnant with my second child. 

At the same time, within the larger group of moms - a smaller group had inadvertently emerged with moms who had younger children.  We all started getting closer finding we had a lot more in common and became our own little network.  It was, and is to this day, VERY nice. 

Life went swimmingly along....until about a month prior to having my second child, I was faced with a career change.  This left me (yet again) in new waters which I had never swam before....and I almost sank.  In addition to the rough economy - finding a new career path in the marketing field in addition to being 9 months pregnant just was NOT going to happen! 

(Enter my current career of Newly Nested)

Thank goodness I had my wonderful husband, my supportive parents, friends and family... 

And, yes, you guessed it.

My group of mommy friends! 

So, what is the point of me sharing all this? 

First and foremost as a stay/work-at-home mom, and secondly, as a baby planner and advisor to new and expecting parents, it is important to address concerns and issues that may (or may not) arise as the result of decisions we make - i.e. staying at home versus going back to work*. 

As wonderful an opportunity as it is, at times, staying home can also be isolating.  If anyone would had ever said to me that being with my children all day was lonely, I would have called them crazy.  Even though I considered myself to be a very social person - this happened to me and I decided to DO something about it.

So, the point of all this is to not let it get to that point.  If you find yourself in a position like I was in - a new mom looking to connect with others - here are some ideas that will get you started. 

1. Go to Meet Up.  Like I said earlier, I found my mommy-saviors there. It's fast to sign up, free and will save your sanity!  There are new groups starting everyday. 

2.  Go to the park.  There's always some friendly moms there. (And some not so friendly ones) You'll quickly find who is willing to chat and those who are not.   

3.  The library.  Another great place to meet other moms is in the children's section.  

4.  If you're breastfeeding - visit La Leche Leauge to find a chapter near you. 

5.  Visit your local town or city's web site for classes for your kids.  I found another great friend from our local Toddler Gym Class at the Park and Recreation Department.  There's also Gymboree's and other kid-gyms or music programs to check out for finding other moms. 

Who knows - you may find a new "mom" friend in the least expected places. 

So, get out there and make some mom-friends! 

Note: This post was from my original blog I started in early 2010 and switched over to this site as my main outlet for information.  I felt it was worth updating and sharing.

**Since this post was originally written, one of my very best friends who was child-less at the time has since had her first baby!

*This post and the suggestions apply to working mothers also. I am speaking from my own experiences and am not looking to start the work at home versus stay at home debate.  I support motherhood. Period.

Life is as easy (or as hard) as you make it

Whenever I am out and about with my two under two - I get stopped at least once or twice by complete strangers who comment on how I "must have my hands full" or "wow, you must be busy."  But, I have to say, my favorite question from moms, past and present, is "how do you do it?" 

This brings me to my new philosophy on life that I'd like to share.  Well, it's not new....but it is new to me.

And that philosophy is that life is what you make it to be. 

Seems like an easy concept to understand and grasp for most people...but in reality, it's a harder concept to apply.


On a daily basis, I now make the concioius effort to either make things easier or harder for myself.  I have come to realize (and most importantly, accept) that I need to just pick and choose my battles with Ethan (who doesn't put up much of a fight - yet) Hailey (who always puts up a fight), Kona the dog (who does NOT listen whatsoever) my husband (surprisingly we rarely fight) - and even battles with myself. 

But I wasn't always this accepting of changing my set-in-stone ways.  It takes time and lots and lots of patience - but every day is well worth the effort of making my life as easy (or as hard) as I want it to be.